Banaue

The last hurray of my Philippines trip was to the “Eighth Wonder of the World” – the famous rice steppes in Banaue.

The story goes that the people living in the Ifugao villages wanted to plant rice, but the rugged mountains in the province made it very difficult to do so. Thus, people got to work making these spectacular terraces right in the side of the mountains that provided flat steppes, each with its own little mud pool in which to plant the rice stalks. This was over 2,000 years ago and the people here are still planting rice in the mountains today!

Mud-walled rice terraces in Banaue, a grueling 10 hour bus ride from the capital city of Manila

The largest Philippine currency is the 1000 peso bill. On the back of it...

...is a picture of this very location where I am standing!

Mandatory jumping pic

A sweat inducing hike to the small village of Batad provided retardedly sweet views. Batad's amphitheater-like rice terraces are stone-walled and looked even more impressive than the ones in Banaue. The walk up and down hundreds of stone steps and rocky terrain was no joke though…

Woulda went by a lot quicker with some heavy sedatives and large velcro pad attaching me to someone's back...

Not sure if I was just deliriously exhausted or if this was indeed the best meal of my life. Awesome fried chicken in the middle of nowhere. Fresh garlic rice harvested from terraces nearby.

These people just look out their windows everyday and get see this view. What a life.

Back to Saigon now. Gotta catch up on work!

Paradise

Just some pics ^.^

Far, far away

Motorbiking to the falls

Night market in Cagayan de Oro, Mindanao Island

Entering the "comfort room" in Manila

Hm, I never found it...

Katibawasan Falls, Camiguin Island

Riding up to the volcano at sunset. The last time it erupted was just 2001, killing 300 people.

Sunken Cemetery

Swimming in the hot springs

View from the ferry to another island

White Island is a beautiful sand bar beach right in the middle of the ocean just off the coast of Camiguin. Gorgeous!

Sunset on White Island

Biggest mall in Asia! It had an amusement park and ice skating rink!

....and guess what else it has!? Look Fat Ass Crew, it's milk tea from Quickly!

Snorkeling at Mantigue Island

White sand beaches on Mantigue

Endlessly stunning beaches complete with active volcano in the background. Camiguin has more volcanoes per sq km than any other place on earth!

(>^_^)>    <(^_^<)

Boracay

Today was an awesome day. I did all the things scumbag tourists do: ride ATVs, sail boats, solicit lady-boys…

Swam today at a place called Willy’s Rock. It wasn’t as phallic shaped as I thought it’d be, but it was thoroughly enjoyable nonetheless.

People used this as a catholic worship site

Putting on the floaties...getting ready for some serial flapping action

Sailing out to the sunset was spectacular. The sunsets here are fucking redonkulous. So many hues of red…like God’s leaking period. I think I even saw a unicorn looking out from behind the clouds, winking.

Why you no has in America!? #thirdworldproblem

Off to another island!

Philippines Day 1

I feel stupid for saying this, but I only found out very recently where the Philippines actually is…like as in the other week recently...

I thought all this was the Philippines...and that Indonesia and Malaysia were near Russia. 

Upon this fantastical discovery in geography, I decided it would be a great idea to go! Why not learn more about this country I never knew existed!?

The Philippines has more than 7000 islands. Well that’s 6999 more than I knew of. Seeing as I only had a week, I had to pick just a few. My first stop is Boracay, the granddaddy of all resorty islands. Tickets were SOOPER cheap, like illegally cheap. I think this airline deals rocks on the side ifyouknowwhatimean.

You jellysaurus rex?

It was just like I imagined it…pristine beaches, in-your-face scenery, white sand, clear aqua water, great little coves and lagoons to crawl in and discover, perfect weather…mmmmmMMM. The less touristy area is called Puka Shell Beach, “where the rare puka shells are found”

"rare" puka shells

Don't judge me. I can't swim.

View from restaurant

Look at the troll face on this creepy net. LOL?

The sunset was TO DIE FOR. Pictures don’t do it justice. Video sucks but I was in a rush :/

Filipino people are the honestest, most trustworthy of the Asians IMHO. They’re the only ones in SE Asia that will discount you for any misgivings. Today I had this pretty good fish and the chef came over and said, “Homez, it’s kinda dry. I’ll discount you OK?” I thought it was fine but sure hell yes. Apparently this happens quite a bit, with transport people as well. You will NEVER see that in Vietnam. They will WERQ your wallet all day, every day.

Seafood here looks very alien

At night, I went to this place called the Hobbit House. It’s exactly what it sounds like. A bar…with little people. There are many ethical issues that should be raised here but might I say they make the best mango-banana shakes!?

No comments on my height in relation to theirs please.

As in Indonesia...people kept asking me if I was Pinay. No, I'm American. I don't speak Tagalog. No, you're Asian...probably filinino yes? Yes. Yes you're right, I am.

Unreal!

Exotic meats a la carte

Konichiwa bitches. I woke up today hungry and determined to find some snake. I’ve had snake before, but this was when I was little. My dad caught one in the ghetto and my mom sautéed it with some lemon grass. It was the defining memory of my childhood that turned me into a meatetarian so I salute you carnivorous serpents.

For din din, we went to this place that had all kindsa weird shit. First few pages of the menu introduced kangaroo, shark, ostrich, and the like, so you know this place was FO SERIAL. I couldn’t order everything, and some of the stuff were out of season (like the snake, unfortunately), so here’s everything I finally decided on.

Grill hot and ready for some MEAAAT

Crocodilly. This was the best. Very spicy, very flavorful!

Ostrich steak. Tasted just like filet mignon.

Awwwww yeahhhhh

It's shit like this, Asia...

Hot boiling pot of bull's penis. This was DISGUSTING. It was meant to be medicinal and increase your stamina or whatever the fuck. It was everything you would imagine cooked peen to taste like: gelatinous, chewy, and flavorless.

That's what she said

Chopped penis and duck embryo in the back. How many times have you said that all together in one sentence?

What would a nice meal of ostrich, croc, penis, scorpion, and embryo be without mocha, white chocolate, and tiramisu for dessert?

My nomadic ass really want to travel somewhere exotic again soon. Should I do Borneo or the Philippines? In Borneo, I get to see orangutans (can’t really say that for anywhere else in the world), but in the Philippines I get to mingle with lady-boys…decisions  decisions!